All the best stories happen at The Chicken Store at 4 a.m.
Let me start from the beginning. There’s an all night gas station just down the road. It has a name, but everyone around here just calls it The Chicken Store. It is the only thing open for miles and miles AND MILES after 10 p.m.
I don’t sleep, so I visit The Chicken Store pretty often in the wee hours of the night. Sometimes for coffee. Sometimes for a snack. Sometimes just to get out of my own head, in hopes that I might get to sleep eventually.
One morning, somewhere between 3 and 4 a.m., I was at The Chicken Store grabbing an iced coffee. As I was in line to cash out, I glanced around, as one does, to check out other patrons. The lady behind me looked back with an electric smile. I mean a million watts, this lady’s smile. Her smile could have lit up the whole Delta seaboard.
The guy cashing me out says, “Good morning,” over the top of my head (I’m fun-sized) to her.
Lady: YASS IT IS, LORDT.
::Me giggling::
Lady continues: I got me a new bra, and LORD HAVE MERCY, all is right with the world!
::Me giggling louder::
Lady goes on: I tell you, it feels so good! Everything’s where it’s supposed to be. Straps feel good. Back feels good. Nothing hanging out nowhere. No hunching all over. LORD, I love a new bra.
(At this point, I am full on laughing out loud and egging her on.)
Me: PREACH THIS MORNING!
(All other customers and employees are men. Just to help set the scene.)
(I feel I should also point out that while she’s going over all the ways she loves her bra, she’s also running her hands all around her sides and boobs.)
Me: I love a good new bra, too. I just hate they’re so expensive!
Lady: I KNOW! I gave $60 for this one, and I hate it, but I love it. I. LOVE. IT.
Me: I have no idea why boob holders are so damn expensive.
Lady: GIRL I KNOW. I love me some “buy one, get one” sales. That’s the only time I can afford a new one. I BOUGHT FOUR O’ THESE THANGS.
Me: I woulda too! Well, I gotta get back to the house. You have yourself a good morning!
Lady: YOU TOO, GIRL!
I leave, laughing all the way out the door, and see all the men hidden among the aisles behind us. Some are smiling, some are frowning, one has his head straight down at the floor with his shoulders hunched and shaking. I don’t know if he was laughing or crying, but he was clearly feeling some type of way.
I swear, I chuckled about that encounter all the way home. She may have been acting a mess, but I thank her from the bottom of my heart for the best laugh to start the day that I’d had in months.
#TalesFromTheChickenStore
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