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Permission To Heal

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Permission To Heal

Give yourself permission to heal. Let me say it again, “Give yourself permission to heal.” The statement sounds really simple in its purest form. Yet, it has depth beyond surface level reasoning. 

Let me explain.

As we step into a new year, a new season, we hear a lot about new beginnings and starting again. I like to call this time of year “goal setting season,” but the world calls it “New Year’s Resolutions.” As a society, we collectively give ourselves and each other permission to set new goals and think positively about the coming year.

I know you may be thinking, “No one has to give me permission to set a goal for myself,” which is ultimately true. However, what I am referring to in this context is what society deems as normal or common. And it is common to set goals during this time of year. 

Common New Year’s Resolutions include eating healthier, losing weight, going to school, finishing a project, etc. All of these goals have a theme. They are all centered around something tangible or something you can “see”. And lets be honest here, sometimes these goals last only a couple of weeks (although this may not be true for everyone). The reasons behind the follow through of the goal or lack thereof, may be different for everyone. But the deciding factors for the follow through, will be identifying the motivating force behind the goals. 

And that brings me to this: What if the New Year’s Resolutions went beyond the tangible? What if the motivating forces were more meaningful than what meets the eye? What if the motivating forces came from within instead of the traditional common threads? 

When speaking of motivating forces from within, what comes to mind for you? Is it sadness, happiness, joy, depression, laughter? In my lifetime, I have spoken to a lot of people and there has been an exchange of information that has enhanced personal and professional growth. One concept that I have paid close attention to during these exchanges is the need for healing that surpasses the surface layer.

Healing is a deeper yearning for peace that comes from within an individual. Inner peace helps a person see things more clearly, feel things more clearly, have a more balanced perception, and enhance the thought process.

Ok, I hear you, “What does healing have to do with goal setting?” For me, I can visualize the connection very clearly. In order for a goal to increase its chances of reaching completion, the motivating force behind the goal will need to be identified. [Of course I am referring to positive motivating forces]. The motivating forces within an individual can be hindered if motivation is blocked due to hurt and pain. To help cover up these hurts or to stop an individual from reaching deeper within themselves, the defense mechanisms will attempt to keep an individual at the surface level to avoid any negative emotional charges from rising to the top. Therefore, repeating the cycles of identifying the same goals, with the same outcomes, year after year. [And yes, the healing process can be like an emotional roller-coaster. Being supported and working alongside a profession can be beneficial].

But this is a new year and a new beginning! I want to encourage everyone to look deeper, reach deeper within yourselves and identify those areas that need healing. Those areas that only you know about. Give yourself permission to move forward and move past the surface layer. Give yourself permission to heal.

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Prudence Hatchett is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) with over 14 years of experience. She is the owner of PH Counseling, LLC, and offers services including counseling, coaching, consultations, and online courses. For more information about her services or contact information, please visit www.phcounseling.org

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