Home Local Humor The Chew Tupelo Pole Says It’s A “Strong, Independent Pole That Don’t Need No Flag”

Tupelo Pole Says It’s A “Strong, Independent Pole That Don’t Need No Flag”

Tupelo Pole Says It’s A “Strong, Independent Pole That Don’t Need No Flag”

TUPELO – In a rare public address, the Tupelo Pole has declared itself a “strong, independent pole that don’t need no flag.”

The Tupelo Pole is a pole standing over 100 feet tall and residing behind the gas station on the corner of Thomas Street and West Main Street in Tupelo, MS. For as long as most residents can remember, the Pole has been there and has never been adorned with anything but the clear blue sky. This is also the first time the Pole has spoken out in recent history.

“This is the first time I’ve known it to talk,” Taquitta Washington says. “I didn’t even know a pole could talk, but here we are.”

The reason for the Pole’s broken silence is unclear, but it is highly speculated that it is due to the recent exposure the Pole has gotten thanks to a local comedian’s satirical “Tupelo Tourism” video wherein the Pole is highlighted as a must-see attraction. As a result, many local residents have taken to voicing their opinions about the Pole’s status — not all of it positive.

“It’s an eyesore,” opines long-time Tupelo resident Dorothy Scruggs. “It just stands there all naked like. It needs a flag, or something — anything really — to make itself presentable to our town. Ain’t nothing Christian about it.”

Not everyone agrees with Scruggs.

“There’s nothing more attractive to me than a Pole that knows what it is and knows what it needs,” says local business owner RJ Morgan. “In this case, it knows what t it doesn’t need, and that’s just as attractive.”

For now, it seems that the Pole will continue to stand as it always has. Tall, strong, independent, and naked.

An attempt was made to reach the Pole for further comment, but it’s too tall and crane rentals are expensive.

Zach Bragg
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Zach Bragg is a Tupelo-based comedian and satirist whose inability to requite his lofty goals with adequate follow-through makes him wonder why he ever agreed to do this in the first place. His experience in journalism includes writing current event summaries for social studies class in middle and high school, as well as reading some Hunter S. Thompson. Originally from Hattiesburg, he moved to Tupelo in 2005 and has called it home ever since, like your classic poser. He achieved modest regional success as the creator of the Tupelo Tourism video series, but has managed not to get a big head about it. Bragg can also be seen every other month as the host of Bees, Dude! (A Comedy Show) at Queen’s Reward Meadery in Tupelo. Zach lives just outside of Tupelo with his wife, kids, and the ceaseless anxiety about things he did and said in middle school.


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